Living in Peace--and Quiet!

You hate it when a new family moves into the apartment above yours. They slam doors going in and out, no matter how late it is. You guess they each weigh two hundred pounds—your bedroom window actually rattles when they stomp around. They yell over their booming stereo, and you now need earplugs to sleep. You complain to everyone in the building and urge two of your friends’ moms to call the police. Eventually your complaints get back to the new neighbors, and the wife visits you. “I heard what you said about us,” she says. “I wish you’d come to us directly. We’ll turn down the music and be quieter. I didn’t know we were disturbing you.” Embarrassed, you mutter, “Thank you,” and close the door.

Try to live at peace with others. For one thing, not everyone will react as pleasantly as your upstairs neighbors. You could start a fight that lasts for months—or years. Gossip just stirs up trouble. “Don’t talk too much, for it fosters sin. Be sensible and turn off the flow!” (Proverbs 10:19 NLT) If there’s a problem, go peacefully to the person and express your concern. See if you can work out a solution together. You may avoid making an enemy—and gain a friend instead.

Miss Know-It-All

Makayla tried to like the girl who moved in next door, but she just couldn’t. Very soon she grew tired of hearing about the girl’s former (better) school, former (cuter) teacher, and former (cooler) friends. To Makayla, it seemed the new girl looked down on everything and everyone—including Makayla. When Makayla or her friends talked, the new girl tilted her head sideways and arched one eyebrow. She sniffed a lot and rolled her eyes. She was called Snooty Sara behind her back.

Before long, Makayla and her friends avoided the new girl. They were tired of the putdowns, her swaggering, the disdainful looks whenever they spoke. One day Sara bragged to the wrong person—their volleyball coach—about how great her former team was and how talented she was in particular. The coach just smiled, then she told Sara that she used to live near Sara’s hometown. She’d coached in a neighboring town before taking her current job. Her old college roommate had actually coached Sara’s former team—through one losing streak after another. Sara wilted in embarrassment as her lies crumbled. “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” (Proverbs 16:18 TNIV)

Don’t look down on others. Think of people as equal—or even better—than yourself. Then pride won’t creep in. Give snoot the boot!

Are You Prejudiced?

You learn about prejudice when your family moves. You never felt out of place while living in Texas, but when your family relocates to a small town in Minnesota, you’re the only Hispanic student in your school. Most kids ignored you. Some treat you like you have a contagious disease. A few call you names. Being the target of discrimination and bigotry is more hurtful than you would have ever guessed. Two years later, your family moves back to Texas. You absolutely love being “home,” but you’ve changed. From now on, you’re careful to never make another prejudiced comment. You learned first-hand the pain it can cause.

Certain people believe they are worth more than others. God’s Word, however, has strong words for such people. “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.” (Romans 12:3 TNIV) God’s Word clearly says that your worth isn’t in your nationality or the color of your skin. Instead, judge yourself by the strength of your faith in God. That’s what really matters.

Anger Management?

What do you do with anger? You’re angry about things happening at home: a divorce, needing to move, having much less money. You hold in the anger at home, but it “leaks” out at school. First it’s in little ways with your friends. But when it increases and you snap at your teachers, you land in detention. In the end, the principal and guidance counselor decide you should attend “anger management” classes. The classes will teach you how to control your anger, how to keep it from making you blow up at people. At the class, you’re taught to explode in safe places, such as by hitting a pillow and screaming alone in your bedroom. The instructor wants you to transfer your anger energy into some other object.

Is that how the Bible says to deal with our anger? No. It doesn’t say manage it. The Bible is very clear. It says get rid of it. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” Ephesians 4:31 (TNIV) Noisy disagreements and fighting only lead to further trouble. Avoid them too. “Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels.” (2 Timothy 2:23 TNIV) You can’t do this alone. Give your anger to God. Ask him for help (many times a day, if necessary) until the anger is gone.

True Value

When Jessica moved to a new town and started middle school, she studied the various groups of girls. Who would be her new friends? Only a couple people from her new Sunday school class attended her middle school. She liked both Teri and Elizabeth—they were fun and kind and friendly—but they definitely weren’t “cool.” On the other hand, Brit and Kayla were obviously the most popular girls. Boys swarmed around them. They invited Jessica to sit at their lunch table, and at first, Jessica was thrilled to be singled out. But the filthy language she heard there—and the nasty backbiting of other students—made her feel dirty. Jessica had a choice to make. Would she choose friends of excellent moral value with high standards? Or would she settle for friends with glitz but no character?

How can you learn to prize what God values? Read God’s Word and let it change your thinking. “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2 TNIV) Choosing what God values will place you in the center of his will—and there’s no better place on earth to be!

Unity in the Family

Emily’s family had a really rough month! First her dad lost his job. When he couldn’t find another one that paid as well, they sold their large home with a pool and moved into a tiny house. Then her mom discovered she was expecting another baby. Emily was in turmoil—until one evening they had a family round table discussion about their situation.

“Loving God comes first,” her dad said, “and then loving each other. If we pull together, we can make this work.” The discussion that followed brought out different ideas for making money, cutting costs, and helping care for the baby when it arrived. There were many different ideas—but the family was like-minded about their purpose: loving God and loving each other.

Unity should exist among Christians. This doesn’t mean thinking exactly alike on everything. It means having the common goal of working together and serving one another, of being “perfectly united in mind and thought.” (1 Corinthians 1:10 TNIV) Being unified comes with the promise of a great reward: God’s presence in your life. “Be of good comfort, be of one mind, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you.” (2 Corinthians 13:11 NKJV) Stand united!

Be a Peacemaker

Maybe your dad likes to pick fights. He fights with your mom, your older brother, his boss, and the neighbors. When he’s drinking, it’s even worse. You try to do everything he wants, but sometimes nothing is good enough. Things can be calm and peaceful one minute, and then within ten minutes of his arriving home, he’s shouting and fighting with someone. The only person able to calm him down is Uncle Mark. He stops by frequently, patiently listens to your dad, and helps him get things fixed around the house. You wish Uncle Mark could live with your family fulltime.

It’s very difficult to live with people who are quick-tempered. They seem to be looking for a fight—and they usually find one. As far as it depends on you, however, be a person who stops quarrels. Don’t add fuel to the fire—instead help put it out. The “fire” might be at home with a brother, at school with a best friend, or with someone on your soccer team. “Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Your anger can never make things right in God’s sight.” (James 1:19-20 NLT) Rather than adding your own anger to a fight, make it your goal this week to be a calming influence on an angry person. Be a peacemaker!